Is AI a substitute for a therapist?

I promise I am not biased. But no!

Here's what Chat GPT, or Gemini, or Claude (despite the human name) cannot copy:

They cannot co-regulate.

It is a computer system, not a nervous system. And it's the energy between two people that can calm (or threat, which can be useful information) our nervous systems. From the therapist's body language, tone of voice, facial expression and posture, these can all act as cues for safety.

They help the avoider, avoid.

For those with an insecure attachment style, AI can actually act as a way to further avoid the discomfort we may be feeling, and disrupt our ability to self-trust and self-soothe.

They can't read your body language.

As therapists, we pick up on a client's affect. Facial expressions, tone of voice, pauses, fidgeting...these are all things undetectable by any of the AI platforms.

They don't notice spaces between words.

The pauses speak loudly, and AI can't detect reluctance. It also gives information in mere seconds, which can be overwhelming for someone to digest. In fact, a friend recently told me that the reason she uses a therapist is because she processes at a slower speed, and appreciates the space in session to really digest and feel.

It's not confidential.

Need I say more?

There's no rupture and repair.

Say you struggle with trusting. How is trust going to be built if you're not exposing yourself to vulnerability with a real person? There's an element of being retraumatised in therapy, of experiencing a rupture and then repairing this with one another, where the real healing is built.

And, the cherry on top of why counselling rules over Chat GPT?

"Because it's impossible for AI to feel."

A genuine quote from someone I asked. And why is it important for AI to feel? Carl Rogers, the creator of the Person-centred approach which underpins the profession, named empathy as one of the most important characteristics of a counsellor. And while AI can sympathise, it cannot truly empathise. Someone sharing in our pain, vicariously, is what can help us feel understood, seen, validated and KNOWN. AI can create the illusion, but that is all it is, an illusion. And for some, intimacy is frightening. But how can we connect with another if we don't expose ourselves. Well, we can't.

And to finish this off with a flourish, here is another quote from a human. "I have had such tender moments of human connection in therapy."

It is the therapeutic relationship, not the techniques, that transforms (Ardito and Rabellino, 2011). And that's simply something that AI can never touch.

References:

• Ardito RB, Rabellino D. Therapeutic alliance and outcome of psychotherapy: historical excursus, measurements, and prospects for research. Front Psychol. 2011 Oct 18;2:270. doi: 10.3389/fpsyg.2011.00270. PMID: 22028698; PMCID: PMC3198542.